How I See It: Reflections on spirituality, technology, and the art of everyday life

Christmas Letter 2013 Dear Friends, It is my custom at this time of year to celebrate with my friends by giving them the gift of self — to share some of what the last year has brought for me. This year I am celebrating Christmas for the 52nd time in my life. Normally, I would be wishing for a white Christmas, but this year I will be in Mexico on Christmas Day, so the closest I’m likely to get is the sand on the beach near the house we are renting. When I say we , I am referring to my friend Mary — more about her later. Since I’m going to Mexico with someone , I will not be hanging my traditional bikini by the fireplace (in hopes that Santa will fill it). I would definitely have to say that of the years of this millennium, this one has been one of the best. Not that it hasn’t had challenges, but as I sit here writing on Thanksgiving Eve, I find that I have more to be thankful for than in many years. Phoenix, my service dog, is coming along in her training. I just wish my health were...

Dear Friends, It is my custom at this time of year to celebrate with my friends by giving them the gift of self — to share some of what the last year has brought for me. This year I am celebrating Christmas for the 51st time in my life, still hoping for a white Christmas like my first year at Heathway in New York, or like the one a few years ago (when I was much too sick to enjoy it). And yes, I still wish I had someone to share it with. I do, however, have a bikini hung by the chimney with care in case Saint Nick wants to fill it. It has been another interesting year — and as the Chinese pointed out, that can’t be good. The biggest news of the year, as most of you already know, is my service dog Phoenix. I got her in April when she was eight weeks old. It has been challenging, but we are doing great, and it’s wonderful to have her here. She is a service dog in training, and the training takes about two years to complete. When we’re done, she’ll be able to help me walk when I’m hav...

Caring Copyright 2008 by Odell S. Hathaway, III Before my late wife became my late wife, she taught me a painful but important lesson. The word “CARE” is a verb. For my sake and for hers, I wish she could have learned that lesson. I think if she had, she might have found the ability to defeat her demons and still be my living wife instead of my late wife. I, on the other hand, will never forget this lesson. You see, the English language is extremely poor in one major way. We possess so few words to express the different meanings of the single word “Love.” Because of this, we have attempted to cram that meaning into words already so full that finding their true meaning becomes almost impossible. This allows us to hide behind these now-meaningless words—like CARE. My wife used to tell me that she cared about me. But the fact is that she seldom, if ever, cared for me—not even after my cancer surgery. Most of the time she treated me like a servant—or as I sometimes told her, ...

Missing Socks and Memories! This morning I was putting on a sweat jacket when I found that I could not get my arm inserted.  I found a sock had managed to make its way into the arm while it was in the wash.  This reminded me of an argument my late wi fe and I had years ago. One day Linda came to me and announced that she needed new socks, that she simply did not have any socks left.  I was surprised by this since I knew she had three dresser drawers full of socks (Linda was something of a sockoholic—I have no idea how many hundreds I donated to Goodwill after she passed). I asked: “Are you sure?  I know there are three drawers full of your socks.” “Yes, but none of them match!” “You have three drawers of socks and none of them match!  What happened to the missing socks?” “The washing machine ate them! Everyone knows washing machines eat socks!” I must say, in her defense, that she was not lying—she truly belie...

Christmas Letter 2011  Dear Friends, It is my custom at this time of year to celebrate with my friends by giving them the gift of self — to share with you some of what the last year has brought for me. Frankly, I am very surprised that I am writing this letter at all. Last year I did not think I would make it to this Christmas — but you never know. If I had to give a name to the year that is ending, I would call it the year of change and anxiety . After I mailed last year’s Christmas letter, I received news that my Pater Seraphicus , Weaver Stevens — my Teacher, Mentor, Spiritual Guide, Guru, Priest, Analyst, and friend — had passed away. Weaver was one of the major forces that shaped who I am, and I miss him deeply. I am very thankful for all the writings he left behind, the videos we made before he retired from the priesthood, and most of all the memories, guidance, and wisdom he shared with me. The greatest compliment I ever received was something he said to me over twenty ...

The Results are in for the cancer! I would like to write a report on all the things that have been going on medically with me since September.  But I do not have the energy right now.  So I will limit myself to my cancer. I have now had blood work, CT scan, PET scan, whole-body scan with radioactive iodine. Today I met with my doctor.  I was nervous about this meeting because my doctor had given me a 45-minute block of time instead of the normal 20.  I tried to calm myself by saying that when they made the appointment they did not have the test results yet, so he did not have reason to think I would need more time.  Turns out I was right and wrong.  He had given me the larger block of time because he expected to have bad news and would need the larger block of time. The results, however, proved him wrong.  The whole-body scan showed nothing.  I do not know if I agree with that — I saw the scans while they were being taken and could ...

Just another day in the ER! For some time now, I have been wanting to make a post about how I am doing since I started my IVIG treatments, so I will do that here and bring you up to speed on what happened today as well. Monday, August 15, at 6:30 AM, I found myself in the ER of my local hospital. I was there primarily because I was having a very difficult time breathing. This had all started last Thursday when I noticed that I was having trouble speaking. My voice was hoarse; for the last year I had been having bouts of hoarseness, so I was not overly worried. Friday, I was still hoarse and noticed that I was having problems breathing—nothing major, just that it took more effort than normal to breathe. Again, this was something I had been dealing with for several years, so I noted it but did not do anything about it. Saturday, I was feeling worse and having a very hard time talking. Sunday, it got very bad; I noticed that when talking or eating, I would get very short of breat...