Chapter 11: The Price of Love

 

For me, the most interesting episode of the entire period was one concerning two life forms from the past.

It was unusual for two life forms from the past to meet if they had not known one another before their deaths. In the time since we had abolished death, the population of the Mega-Universe had increased dramatically. Those living in my time far outnumbered those of the dead.

One cold night on my home planet, such a meeting did occur. A man was alone in his home watching a broadcast. This man had lived mostly in the way of our people, trying to fit in, but not always understanding our ways.

Outside the house, there was a woman with murder in her mind, a woman whose one thought was to destroy the life form in the house. She intended to sneak into the man’s house and try to kill him. She came up from behind him. Unfortunately for her, she tripped on a wire. The man, who had tried so hard to learn the ways of our people, could not allow his life to be sacrificed. He turned on the intruder, and a scuffle ensued. They fought for some time, when finally the weapon the intruder was carrying discharged, killing her instantly. Because she believed that being hit would kill her, she died.

At first, the man felt relief that he had saved himself and the members of his family from destruction. Later, he felt sorrow for what had occurred. His sorrow was not that he had killed, but that a society existed where people like this could roam the streets killing at will. It made him angry. He believed in the law and order of the past. He believed that this society should protect the individual even at the cost of individuality. He believed that his life was more important than hers.

As he sat there thinking, he became more and more angry. He realized that not only had society let him down, but society had let her down as well. He was furious at the society that would allow this to occur, much less condone it and support it.

After many hours, he called out, “Why do you people let this happen?”

The answer came in the form of the being that called itself God. He said, “Why ask how they let this happen? It was your choice to kill her.”

“But she would have killed me. Why did you not stop her?” the man cried.

“Because,” God replied, “each individual must make the decision for peace. If anyone else makes it for you, there is no peace, only slavery. Each of you must make your own decision. The reasons for her behavior were not so different from your reasons. You killed in order to protect your life. Are you sure you are right, while she was wrong? She killed to save her life. In her mind, she thought she needed power instead of love. It was not the most beautiful of compromises, but the only one she had ever known. You destroyed her for it.”

“But I did not want to kill her, I had to,” the man protested.

“Did you?” asked God. “It was your decision to make, and you made it. Do you now feel sorry for your precious life? You exist, but she does not.”

The man hesitated before continuing. “God, what can I do? I did the only thing I could. My life was threatened, and I had to react in some manner. I had to protect myself, just as any individual would.”

“No, you did not protect yourself,” God replied. “You did not have to. You fought back instead of thinking back. You went into the chase with as much vigor as she did. You were seeking the glory, not love. You didn’t see the things she needed. Would you like to face her now and find out exactly what it was that she was after?”

“Well, I guess,” the man mumbled.

“You guess?” God questioned him. “Then, I do not think so. Let me ask you this. Do you feel that your taking her life was such a right act? Was it so important to preserve your life that you should allow her to die?”

The man said nothing. God said, “Do you feel that perhaps you ought to permit her to live? All it would take is for you to ask for her life, and it would be granted.”

The man asked if God would restore her life, and they faced each other, but this time neither could hurt the other. The man asked the woman why she tried to take his life. She said, “I have no idea why. I just needed to. Besides, what do you care? What the hell does anybody care anyway? None of you gives a damn about me! What would you do? The only thing I can do is kill. Believe me, I do that well, you piece of shit!”

“In this new world, you could do anything. Here, the entire universe is open to you,” he argued.

“Right, I have heard that before,” she shouted. “I am supposed to go out and find myself a place in this new, wonderful world. Like hell I am! You think it’s as easy as they say? I’ve been down that road. I saw it in the past, and I don’t believe this is any different.”

“It is here that love exists,” he said.

“Yeah, that cheap love that I feel from the bodies. I do not want that. I do not want their love. I have had it up to here with that. All I want is their silence. All I want is power. What did you feel, you dear piece of shit, when you killed me?” she answered.

The man thought about that for a little while. “Why, I felt weak.”

“You felt weak, did you? Man, you are a weird one! Look, I do not want to sit around here anymore. Go away, you weak little thing. You knew the thrill, I could feel it coming from you.”

The woman left, but the being that called itself God remained. He said, “Describe your weak feeling.”

“I felt weak because of a weak society of which I was a member. I felt weak because I was powerless to help this being,” the man explained.

“Were you powerless?” God asked.

The man thought some more. “If I were to give her love instead of the power she wanted, could I have helped her?”

“Yes,” He answered, “all she wanted was love. She may not have known it, but that was all she needed. You cannot force it on her. She must find it herself. Your love is the only way that she can do that.” With that, God left him.

 


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